Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Allegra and Ruby Assist With Tax Preparation


‘Tis the season. Many of us are working on our taxes, and whether you’re super organized and only have to download your data into Turbo Tax, or whether you’re still using a shoebox system, haven’t you wished that someone else could do this chore for you?

Enter the Feline Tax Assistant. The main responsibilities of a feline tax assistant position are to assist and support hinder their human in organizing receipts, entering data in spreadsheets walking across the keyboard, printing said spreadsheets batting at said spreadsheets as they come out of the printer, and helping their human locate missing receipts chasing receipts all over the office.

Allegra and Ruby excel at these tasks. Thanks to their help, getting my taxes done has become a breeze takes far longer than it should. But they’re so enthusiastic about their assistance, how could I be mad at them?

Ruby: Allegra, look, Mom has papers spread all over the dining room table! What does this mean?

Allegra: It means that it’s tax time, Ruby.

Ruby: What’s tax time?

Allegra: It’s something humans have to do. They have to pay the government money because they make money.

Ruby: So it’s a good thing? Because making money is good, right?

Allegra: Yes, it’s a good thing. Because if Mom didn’t make any money, we wouldn’t have a nice warm house, and food, and toys.

Ruby: But why can’t she keep all her money?

Allegra: You know when sometimes she uses bad words? That’s when she’s asking herself that same question…

Ruby: Why does she need all these papers to pay the government money?

Allegra: Because she has to show how much money she made, and how many deductions she has.


Ruby: What’s a deduction?

Allegra: You know when you get yourself in trouble? And you don’t get any treats? That’s a deduction.

Ruby: Huh. So why doesn’t she just pay the government in treats? I bet they’d like that much better than money!

Allegra: Sighs.

Ruby: Look Allegra! Look at all these little pieces of paper!

Allegra: Those are called receipts, Ruby.

Ruby: I’m going to receipt them off the table and chase them around the house! Wee!!!

Allegra: We’re supposed to help Mom, Ruby, not make this job more difficult for her.

Ruby: Why is she muttering to herself, Allegra?

Allegra: I think she needs some kitty kisses, Ruby.

Ruby: I think she needs some tuna!

The girls really have been very helpful when it comes to getting my taxes done. It’s impossible to get too stressed about taxes when you have two adorable tortie faces watching your every move.

Do your kitties help you prepare your taxes?

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