Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Allegra’s World: 5 Ways to Charm Your Human


Hi everyone, it’s Allegra! It’s been a while since you heard from me, and I finally got Mom to agree that I can share something I’ve been wanting to tell you about for a long time: how I get Mom to do what I want her to do. Now I’m pretty sure most kitties already know how to do it, but I thought that by revealing my secrets, it might make humans comply a little faster when we employ some of these techniques, because, let’s face it, humans can be a little slow on the uptake sometimes.

So, without further meow, here are five things I do to charm Mom into doing my bidding:

  1. Rub my face against her legs. I do this when I want her to really pay attention to me. I may only want her to pet me, or I may want a treat, or maybe it’s time to feed me. Sometimes, I do it just because it feels nice to be that close to Mom. And I know she likes it because she always smiles when I do it. Bonus tip: if this doesn’t get her attention, I’ll  give her toes a little nip!
  2. Blink at her. Humans love the “slow blink,” because they think it means that a cat is telling them “I love you.” Well, okay, so it does mean that. But it’s also the feline version of what humans call “batting your eyelashes at someone,” and it’s guaranteed to at the very least make your human go “awww, you’re so cute” and with any luck, that will lead to pets and treats.
  3. Yoga stretches. Mom adores it when I do a nice, long “downward dog” stretch (I don’t know why it’s called that, it really should be called “downward cat!”) and will usually come right over and pet me. If the stretch alone doesn’t do the trick, I roll over on my side. Mom knows better than to pet my belly, because I don’t like that, but I love having her rub all along my back over and over.
  4. Chirp. Yes, you read that right, and no, I’m not a bird, silly. But I can make a sound that sounds just like a chirp, and for some reason, Mom thinks it’s utterly adorable. She always comes looking for me when I chirp, and when she finds me, that inevitably leads to pets, and sometimes even treats.
  5. Do something I’m not supposed to do. When all else fails, it’s time to bring out the big guns. Knocking something off a shelf or table, preferably something that makes a lot of noise, will get her attention for sure. Of course, then I just sit there being my adorable self, and there’s no way she can be mad at me. In fact, she usually laughs.

Mom says what I’m doing is called “manipulation,” which sounds rather sinister to me. Or else, she’s just an easy mark – but then, how could she not be, when I’m so cute and charming?

So tell me, kitties: what do you do to charm your human?

The post Allegra’s World: 5 Ways to Charm Your Human appeared first on The Conscious Cat.

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